Sunday, May 3, 2015

Grades Hit Ya Hallelujah

Hello Gentle Reader,

I mean that in the truest sense of the word. I hope you are being gentle with yourself as we head into the last week of finals for the year. Jesus. The year. How did it get to be May 3rd already? It seems like yesterday that we were just a group of strangers sitting nervously in 2222 trying to figure out our lockers, our scrubs, what the hell we were doing. Now we are among friends family. I know this to be true, because without question I stuff a whole burrito in my face during lecture without evening thinking. Now that's only something you do with people you really love.

At the beginning of the year I wasn't sure we'd make it here. The stress seemed too great to bear at times. Anatomy lab left me unable to do anything else but fall into my bed exhausted....sometimes showered, sometimes not. We survived some brutal lectures (insert fructose joke here) and some lessons from the school of hard knocks (yes all the computers are broken, take this final on paper).

But we did make it and well, here we are. I'm trying hard to savor these last days. Medical school is happy years. I just know it and then I just forget it. I forget how lucky we are to be here, chosen out of thousands for this. And while our careers will include making people better, we are the ones who are made better for our time here. As much as we'd like to be released from our overly caffeinated study prison (hmmm...I wonder if prison would be a good place to study), savor these last days. Drink them in like cool wine diet coke water. We won't be back here again, and at our reunion I'm betting we will most certainly wish to be.

Don't get me wrong- ENRG scares the crap out of me. Study. Help each other. Breathe. Lather, rinse, repeat. Enjoy the swirling together of chaos and confusion, excitement and achievement. But know this...research has shown that people actually do better when the pressure isn't as great--ironic as that is. Give yourself a break. Literally get up from the chair to which your ass has left a permanent indent and go eat/shower/sleep/workout. I'm looking at you, and you look tired.

We have wonderful adventures that lie ahead. I'm giddy with the prospect of how the next three years will unfold. How many stories and fond memories have we yet to live? The feeling of just having to get through the next few days will never go away. I often find myself making deals with the universe. "Just get me through these quizzes, these finals, just this one test and then just this other one too. I promise I'll start going to the gym after its done. I'll call my mom back, I'll be better next time, just this one time, do me a solid cosmic miracle." But the challenges in front of us won't stop and I guess if we're really honest, that's a good thing. Its okay to feel stressed, its okay to be worried, its okay to be exhausted. But I implore you gentle reader, don't rob yourself of savoring these last moments.

Remember, you are a human being of infinite and immeasurable worth. No grade defines you.

Can I get an amen?


(I stole this video from a classmate's facebook page. It speaks to my heart)

(and this)